Being a man today can be difficult. There’s trouble on the dating scene, where we aren’t sure exactly what we bring to the table or what we’re even allowed to bring. We wonder how we can find a wife who shares our values during a time of hooking up, rampant divorce, and OnlyFans. Though we call the men in our lives friends, they aren’t challenging us to grow. Our friendships remain on the surface, never venturing too deep. Society seems to be against us: toxic masculinity, mansplaining, and people telling us to be more effeminate. Then, there’s the internal issue of purpose. Many of us are just drifting through life without ambition or goals. After all, why put in the effort if we aren’t needed in society?

Our fathers and grandfathers believed that they were teaching us how to be men, but their generation and the generations before paved the way for where we are today. Men have ended up so lost.

The church provides some solace with opportunities to connect with like-minded brethren, but the church is not free from cultural norms. And if you’re a young man at a church with older adults or an older adult at a younger church, finding these connections and community can be difficult. With that difficulty comes loneliness.

Yet, no matter how lonely you are or how broken you feel, you are not alone. There are other men, even if you don’t know them, who are contending with the same experiences. They know the feeling of being looked over. They understand the frustration of trying to do the right thing and still not seeing the desired results. I certainly do.

But more importantly, you are not alone because you worship a God who is with you, for you, and loves you. He gives us reason to push forward with hope despite the circumstances we face.

Much of society is struggling with loneliness right now; sadly, men make up the majority of those who commit suicide. However, we can curb these statistics by discovering God’s purpose for our lives, seeking meaningful fellowship, and finding ways to be vulnerable. We don’t have to give up. We can endure.

Here are nine ways you can encourage yourself during the seasons of loneliness:

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