The New York Times published a story last week titled “With Gen Z, Men Are Now More Religious Than Women.” The article featured several churches and included the opinions of local congregants and leaders in Waco, Texas, where I live.

The story’s general thesis, which can be gleaned from the title, is that men are attending church at a growing rate while the rate of female attendees is declining. The article offered possible explanations but was more concerned with the phenomenon and its impact on society.

I am not here to discuss the merits of the article or the way it presented the issue. What matters is that the phenomenon exists, and it is far past time to discuss why. For centuries, women have been the backbone of religious life and organization. 

Research shows that women still lead in attendance, piety and involvement within religious circles in much of the world. Yet here, women are leaving the church. 

They aren’t leaving the faith, which is an important issue, the article notes, but the church as a body. Why?

First, I’d like to affirm that men are not inherently reluctant Christians. Some of the most faithful, devoted, inclusive followers of Christ I know are men. However, the church structure in our country has long allowed men to be stagnant when, in reality, we are all called away from a lukewarm mentality.

Even so, my opinion here is not about why men are increasingly drawn to church but why women are being pushed away.

I did not grow up with any women in church leadership. The closest thing I saw to a woman at the pulpit was the elderly woman who played the organ, situated about five feet from the podium.

Isn’t this the picture of long-suffering women in American churches? Necessary for every function, but roped off five feet away from the pulpit. Capable of holding the entire operation together but deemed incapable of speaking to the body.

Now, in many churches, more women hold leadership positions. I have spoken to female chaplains, senior pastors and youth directors, all walking in their ordained callings. However, women my age are still leaving.

There are still barriers to who we can be and even what we can be called in many churches. Churches with wonderful leadership who care deeply about the Gospel can not decide if it is worth it to call a woman a “pastor.”

While men are inherently affirmed, we are constantly in tension. A man stepping into an administrative role is heralded as selfless, but women stepping up is cause for concern.

What do you do when the faith you love deeply and the body you are committed to serving see your capability as a hot-button issue? How do you reckon with being a debated subject without ever knowing it?

For an increasing number of women, they leave.

This should be treated as a danger to the church— not just because women have historically taken the lead in volunteering and community work or because of declining membership or tarnished reputations.

It is dangerous because, more than ever, the church is meant to serve as a beacon of light in the world. The church is a body, one in which each believer has a role to play. However, it will atrophy when some of its extremities flee.

Yet in this body, there are seemingly more men. To some, this is a positive development.

It is common to hear that there are more “good Christian girls” than boys or men. Men have long been a focus of the church’s “morning ministries,” which read Timothy and discuss “men of God.”

When men struggle to attend, we obsess over reasons, and when they return, it is a cause for celebration. The reality of women attending church never seems notable to anyone.

Often, women are forced to face the dichotomy in faith tradition. My friends who grew up in places where women in leadership were common were confused by the lack of female presence in many churches in our college town. We are consistently asked to reckon with ourselves and our values when we sit in church pews, and we are tired.

Young women aren’t leaving the church because they lack faith; they are leaving because they feel homeless. They are exhausted from fighting for belonging in a place that should foster it.